In a satirical post that has set political observers laughing, former presidential aide Lauretta Onochie, writing on her X (formerly Twitter) handle, painted a vivid picture of what she described as a dramatic power shift in Rivers State politics.
According to the tongue-in-cheek narrative, former political strongman Nyesom Wike has been “buried politically,” not with fanfare or formal rites, but amid loud laughter from spectators who appear to be enjoying the unfolding drama..
There was reportedly no condolence register, no wake-keeping just a swift reassignment.
The post alleges that @officialABAT and @Hope_Uzodimma1 did more than ease Wike out of the way.
In classic satirical flourish, they are said to have pushed him under the political bus and then calmly handed over the steering wheel, spare tyre, and ignition key to Rivers State Governor Siminalayi Fubara (@SimFubaraKSC).
As the story goes, how smoothly the bus now runs depends largely on how much pride Wike is willing to swallow without choking.
The less resistance, the smoother the ride.
Breaking the situation down for casual observers, Onochie’s post suggests that Governor Fubara is poised to recover the “missing six months taking from him through undemocratic state of emergency,” secure a second term, and before the end of 2026, politely nominate Wike’s replacement doing so, of course, with a smile.
The unfolding episode has already been christened “The Great Rivers Reversal.”
In this version of events, roles have been dramatically swapped: the former godfather has now been formally introduced to a new one, and speaking from the front seat is no longer guaranteed.
To help with adjustment and acceptance, the satirical piece concludes that political therapists have prescribed a simple daily affirmation for inner peace:
“Fubara is my new Godfather.” Repeat slowly. Breathe in. Breathe out.
